Jeff's News Nuggets: Parrots, Criminals and Jello

Written by Jeff Booth - jbooth@kgmb9.com

May 02, 2008 07:09 AM

With so many things going on in the world we can't bring you every story making headlines. But that doesn't mean we can't try. And that's where our very own Jeff Booth is stepping. We've given him his own segment with stories you probably didn't hear about in "Jeff's News Nuggets." And we have to admit, we're a little nervous.

We've all tried to get a parrot to say "Polly want a cracker" at some time or another. But what if polly cursed you for it? That's where Barney the macaw steps in. The 7-year-old parrot has a mouth like a sailor and once told a mayoress, a vicar and two police officers to bleep off. What's worse: he's now passing his knowledge on to other birds. His owner, Geoff Grewcock, says Barney and two of his friends sit around and swear at each other all day now. Kids, these are the birds your parents warned you about. One day they're swearing, the next day they're smoking.

Here's a great ad for the classifieds: wanted - drinking buddy for my 88-year-old dad. Mike Hammond didn't put the ad in the paper, instead he advertised at his local post office. A number of people came forward for the job. All were willing to drive his dad from the nursing home to the local pub for 7 pounds, or roughly 14 dollars an hour plus expenses. Instead of paying overtime, Hammond split the job between a former military man and a retired doctor. Parents I apologize if one of your kids just told you they've figured out what they want to be when they grow up.

You can put these next two stories in the stupid criminal file. The first one: a 12 and a 14 year old boy walked into a building and tried to rob a woman by implying they had a gun. Here's the thing though. She was behind bulletproof glass, and happened to be working the desk at the Port Saint Lucie police department in Florida. Something tells me these kids won't be getting an academic scholarship anytime soon.

A 51-year-old Ontario man is back behind bars after phoning his local police department and asking for a wake-up call so he wouldn't miss his court appearance the next morning. That's not illegal, but police were so shocked they ran Donald Baker's records and found he had another warrant out for his arrest so they acted on it. I couldn't find out whether or not authorities gave him that wake-up call but I hope they did.

What's delicious, jiggles and stops traffic? Jello, of course. In Jacksonville, Florida a truck driver overturned his vehicle spilling Jello snack packs all over the I-95 freeway. He was quickly rescued and will be okay. And we now we know Bill Cosby was right, there is always room for J-E-L-L-O.